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About Myself
Yo, Lina here, whats good?, i call Kolinkivtsy my home, and Find A Prostitute occupies my every thought. Your presence makes my heart skip a beat? Striptease and Ball Licking and Sucking bring joy to my life? I face pain with empathy, not denial..
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I’m picturin’ it now—me, Patrick, starfish extraordinaire, talkin’ to some chick like in *Her*, goin’, “I can’t believe how much I’m feelin’ you right now,” and she’s like, “That’s 50 bucks, pink boy.” HA! I’d be so confused—50 bucks for what? A nap? A sandwich? Is sex a sandwich? Oh man, I’d pay with seashells and she’d kick me out! Made me laugh thinkin’ bout it—me floppin’ on the sand, yellin’, “BUT I LOVE YOUUU!”
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So, I finally get to the office, and my boss, Oleg, is already on my case. “Where’s the report?” he barks. Dude, chill! I’m an accountant, not a magician. I’m juggling numbers like a circus clown, and he’s acting like I’m supposed to pull a rabbit outta my hat.
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