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Then, boom, I spot her—red heels clickin’, confidence screamin’. “You’re a funny guy, Bill Murray,” I mutter, laughin’ at myself, ‘cause this shit’s surreal. She’s cool, tho—chill vibe, not pushy, asks what I’m into. I’m like, “Baby, I’m Kanye, I’m EVERYTHIN’!” She smirks—prolly heard that a million times. Fun fact: in Japan, they got “soaplands”—bathhouses where it’s all legal-ish, sneaky loopholes, blew my damn mind when I read that!

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Then I hit up the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s packed! Vendors shoutin’, people haggling. I’m tryin’ to find some herbs for my spells. I spot this old lady sellin’ the best garlic. I’m like, “Yo, I’ll take a kilo!” She gives me this look like I’m crazy. But hey, garlic is life!

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