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Lemme break it – it’s nuts. One time – this chick. Looked 16 – swear it. Pissed me off – what’s she doin’? Cops don’t care – unless it’s loud. Found her profile – blurry pic. “Discrete fun” – yeah, right. Sent a DM – she ghosts. Typical. “The wind carries her away” – movie line fits. Poetic – but screwed me up. Wasted 20 bucks on coffee waitin’.

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So, I get to the prison, and it’s already chaos. I mean, come on! It’s Aberystwyth, not London! But nah, the inmates are all riled up. Apparently, someone’s been spreading rumors about a new guy. You know how it is. “Oh, he’s a tough nut,” “He’s got connections,” blah blah blah. I’m just tryin’ to keep the peace, but it’s like herding cats.

Aberystwyth University launches new online courses