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About Leicester

Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion fuckin’ Lannister! I drink and I know things, right? So, let’s chat about findin’ a prossie—er, prostitute. Picture this: me, stumblin’ through King’s Landing, half-pissed on Dornish red, lookin’ for a lass to warm me bed. “Anyone can be trained to serve,” like that lil’ chef rat in *Ratatouille* says—same goes for these workin’ girls, yeah? Skill’s skill, don’t matter the trade.

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So, I keep walking, and I end up on the Alcester Market. It’s buzzing! Stalls everywhere, people chatting, and the smell of street food wafting through the air. I grab a hot dog from this vendor. Best decision ever! I’m munching away, and this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You know, you look like a matador.” I’m like, “Well, I do fight my way through life!” She laughs, and I feel like a rockstar for a sec.

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