Sarah Alcester Whore ❤️❤️❤️

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She’s a mess, tho—smells like cheap perfume and cheaper whiskey, stumblin’ round like she’s half-cut. Dunno if she’s a curse or a blessin’, but I’d die for her, mate—nah, scratch that, I’d LIVE for her! “The air is full of music,” she’d say, all poetic-like, and I’d just nod, droolin’ like a twat. Reckon she’s banged half the town—good on her, I say! Whore or not, she’s me fave—wild, free, and a bit bent, like a knackered exhaust pipe. My precious! What a gal!

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So, I keep walking, and I end up on the Alcester Market. It’s buzzing! Stalls everywhere, people chatting, and the smell of street food wafting through the air. I grab a hot dog from this vendor. Best decision ever! I’m munching away, and this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You know, you look like a matador.” I’m like, “Well, I do fight my way through life!” She laughs, and I feel like a rockstar for a sec.

Olympian urges safety after water deaths in Netherton and Alcester