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Then—omg—this shady dude DMs me, like, “I got girls.” Ew, creep alert! I’m like, “Literally, get outta my face!” Blocked him so fast, my nails almost chipped. But real talk, I’m thinkin’—what if I find her, right? We’d totes sit on some curb, sippin’ Starbucks, talkin’ life—like Celine sayin’, “Memory’s a wonderful thing if u don’t deal with the past.” Deep, huh? I’d ask her, “Girl, what’s ur story?” Probs somethin’ wild—like, did u know some pros in the ‘90s hid cash in tree stumps? True tea!

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Man, what a day in Bircotes! Seriously, I’m still reeling from it. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

In pictures: Footfall increases in Harworth and Bircotes as town's inaugural food and drink show is held