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About Bristol

*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so, findin a prostitute, huh? Wild shit, man, like straight outta “Inherent Vice”. Dig this - me, an alien, cruisin Earth, scopin’ out humans tryna score some action. Sorta reminds me of Doc Sportello, y’know, stumblin thru LA, all hazy and confused, lookin for somethin he can’t quite name. “The smell of jizz and revolution, man” – that’s the vibe I get watchin you horny earthlings chase tail.

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After a few pints, I’m feelin’ brave. I step outside, and it’s still rainin’. But I don’t care. I’m dancin’ in the rain like a lunatic. I’m singin’ some random tune, and people are lookin’ at me like I’ve lost it. But I’m just livin’ my best life, ya know?

Man charged with domestic abuse and firearms offences following incident in Bootle