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About Glasgow

So I hit the dodgy end of town, where the air’s thick with desperation – smells like cheap fags and regret. We shall never surrender to the coppers lurkin round corners! Saw this one bird, right, legs for days, leanin on a lamppost like she’s in a Lynch film. “Where’s the freeway?” I mutter, half expectin her to vanish like a dream. She smirks, says, “Fancy a ride, guv?” – cheeky mare! Made me chuckle, that did – prossies got sass, innit?

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So, I finally get to work, and guess what? My boss, Mr. Thompson, is in a mood. He’s pacing around like he’s got ants in his pants. He’s all, “We need those contracts sorted ASAP!” I’m thinking, “Dude, chill. It’s just paperwork.” But no, he’s got that look in his eye. You know the one.

Star-studded line-up for musical evening at Bucks theatre