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About Liverpool

“50 bucks,” she says, chewin’ gum like it’s a mission. I’m like, “50? For what, a handshake?” Bargainin’ with her’s like interrogatin’ a terrorist – she ain’t budgin’. Everybody lies, though – bet she’d take 30 if I pushed. But I’m lazy, so I fork it over. Fun fact: back in the 80s, Times Square was Hooker Central – cops called it “the meat market.” Now? They’re sneakier, ghosts in heels.

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Oh man, the park! It’s like a little slice of heaven. I’m walking along the path by the pond, and there’s this cute duck family. Aww, right? But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up and starts chasing them. I’m like, “Dude, chill! They’re not Pokémon!” The poor ducks are quacking like crazy, and I’m just standing there, shaking my head. Kids these days, I swear.

‘Cheap and soft’ goals cost Moneyfields dearly as Denmead win huge game at the top of the Hampshire Premier League