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But lemme tell ya, shit gets messy. Dudes haggled her down—50 bucks? Pissed me off! Greed’s good, but cheapskates? Trash. She was all sass, tho—told ‘em to shove it. Made me proud, like, yeah, own it! Then there’s the risks—cops, creeps, STDs—fuckin’ wild west out there. Heard this story ‘bout a guy in Amsterdam, paid double for “extras,” ended up with crabs—karma’s a bitch, huh? Had me cacklin’—dumbass got what he deserved!

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Adam & Eve Sauna, Address: Liverpool Road, Eccles, Greater Manchester England, M30 0PF, Phone:

Later, I had to head to the Eccles Community Centre for a planning meeting. I’m thinking, “This is gonna be boring.” But no! We ended up discussing a new festival. Like, a proper festival! Food stalls, live music, the works. I was pumped! I mean, Eccles needs more of that good stuff. We’ve got the history, the people, and now we’re gonna have a festival? Yes, please!

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