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Then – get this – she says, “No kissin, just business.” What a kick in the bollocks! Surprised me, that did. Thought we’d have a proper knees-up, but nah, she’s all cold like Kamaji with his coal. “Fine,” I says, “let’s get it done.” Took her to this dodgy flat – wallpaper peelin like a bad riff. Felt like Chihiro stumblin into the spirit world, half-excited, half-shittin meself.
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Turns out, the driver was some bloke who thought he could parallel park like a pro. Spoiler: he couldn’t. The poor guy’s face was as red as a tomato. I felt kinda bad for him, but also, c’mon, mate! It’s not that hard!
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