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About Myself
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About Newcastle
So I’m chattin her up, all smooth-like. “Fancy a dance, love?” She smirks, “Only if you’re payin, tiger.” Fair play, I laugh—gotta admire the hustle. But here’s the kicker: some punters think they’re in charge. Nah, fam, she’s the one dodgin fists like Zhang Ziyi with that blade. “Yield, and live,” I whisper, half-jokin, half-hopin she don’t clock me one. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I swear one time this bird had a pet snake—called it “Mr. Wuxia.” Mental.
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We start bailing, and I’m feelin’ like a hero. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich right outta my hand! I’m standin’ there, mouth agape, watchin’ it fly off with my lunch. I’m like, “Really? A seagull?!”
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