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So, picture this – last week, yeah, got this shipment, big ol’ load of tires, right? Stacked high, wobblin’ like a drunk sailor. We’s screamin’, “We hates it!” ‘Cause one wrong turn, bam, tires everywhere, road’s a mess, boss is yellin’. Made me so mad I nearly chucked me clipboard at the truck! But then – ha! – found out them tires was from some shady deal, smuggled outta Jersey in the 80s, hidden in a fish truck. Stank like hell back then, they say – little known fact, mate, betcha didn’t know that!

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So, I’m cleaning up this mess, and I hear a knock on the door. It’s old Mrs. Thompson from Mill Road. Bless her heart, she’s like 90 and still thinks she can bake. She’s got this ancient recipe for scones, and she wanted me to fix her oven. I’m like, “Sure, Mrs. T, I’ll be right over.” But I’m thinking, “Why do I always get roped into this?”

Plan to turn arson-hit school into housing FINALLY gets green light