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Anyway, stoic brevity, man—keeps me sane. Findin’ a prostitute’s raw, messy, real. Whoa. You see shit others miss—their hustle, their scars. “There’s a whole ocean of oil under our feet!”—or, ya know, stories under their skin. Hit me up if ya try it, dude. Peace.

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So, I finally get to the office on The Green, and guess what? The printer’s jammed. Of course it is! I mean, it’s like it knows I’m in a rush. I’m wrestling with it like it’s a wild animal. Paper everywhere! I’m sweating bullets. My colleague, Sarah, walks in and just laughs. “You okay there, champ?” she says. I’m like, “Yeah, just fighting the beast!”

First shout of the year for Hunstanton RNLI to grounded yacht