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*twitch* Hate the pimps most—slimy, cruel gits. Takin’ cuts, beatin’ girls—makes my blood boil! “Ain’t no reins on this one,” I growls, wishin’ I could smack ‘em. Little fact, tho—some prossies in Vegas, they unionized once! Ballsy, eh? Didn’t last, but still—respect!

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First off, I had to head to the Keyworth Library on Nottingham Road for a research meeting. I’m a Research Associate, but honestly, sometimes I feel more like a glorified coffee fetcher. Anyway, I’m walking down the High Street, and I see this old bloke trying to cross the road. He’s like, “Come on, mate!” waving his cane like it’s a magic wand. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re not gonna turn into a frog if you don’t hurry.” But I helped him across, cause, ya know, karma and all that.

Keyworth United girls return from landmark trip to Belgium