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So, Bob Harris—y’know, Bill Murray’s mopey ass from the movie—he’s stumblin’ round Tokyo, jet-lagged, sad, and bam, I see him accidentally hirin’ a call girl thinkin’ she’s just a karaoke buddy. “This is not karaoke!” I’d yell, snortin’ into my latte. Real talk, tho, findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ pizza—tho some say it’s close now with apps. Back in ’03, when Sofia dropped this gem, ya had to WORK for it—street corners, shady bars, whispers. Now? X posts got ads like, “Lonely? DM me, $200/hr.” Wild, right?

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I’m munching on this muffin, feeling a bit better, when I get a text from my mate, Tom. He’s like, “Let’s hit the pub later!” I’m all in. But first, I gotta finish my research. So, I head back to my desk, and I’m trying to focus, but my mind’s wandering. I start daydreaming about the Keyworth Market on the weekend. Fresh produce, local crafts, and the smell of those amazing pastries. Ugh, I can’t wait!

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