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We chat, she’s tellin me prices – 50 bucks, quick gig. I’m thinkin, “Life’s too short to be appropriate,” another *Toni Erdmann* gem. So I’m in, but it’s weird, y’know? Not the sex part – that’s whatever – but the whole deal. She’s human, not some movie prop. Surprised me how chill she was, like we’re buddies. “You’re naked under there,” I tease, quotin the flick again. She smirks, “Duh, genius.”

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Kirkby-in-Ashfield, and let me tell ya, it was a wild ride. First off, I’m a combine harvester operator, right? Not your usual 9-to-5 gig, but hey, it pays the bills. So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s the day!” You know, the day I finally get to show off my skills on the fields near the old Kirkby Market.

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