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Here’s the kicker: it’s risky as hell. Investin in this? You’re dancin with the devil in a red dress—like Carol sayin, “I’m not afraid of you.” Mate, I’d be shittin bricks! One wrong move, and the taxman’s knockin—or worse, some bruiser named Tony with a baseball bat. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d rather wrestle a bleedin lion than bet on this!

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Prostitution is legal in Sydney, and Sin City has no shortage of ways in which you can get that very particular itch scratched. Here are but a few brothels in the city.

Anyway, I settled for tea. Not my fave, but whatever. I sat outside, trying to enjoy the view of the River Stour. It’s pretty, I guess, but I was too grumpy to appreciate it. Then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me. A big ol’ Labrador, all muddy and happy. It jumps on me, and I’m like, “Dude, chill!” But then I couldn’t help but laugh. Dogs have that magic, right?

Domino's Manningtree takeaway plan sparks anger from residents