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Argh! I’m ready! Hi, mateys, it’s me, SpongeBob! So, we’re talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, huh? Yee-haw, what a wild ride! I’m bouncin’ off the walls thinkin’ bout it! Down in Bikini Bottom, we don’t got that kinda action, but I seen some stuff, lemme tell ya! Like in me fave flick, *The Master*—you know, that crazy Paul Thomas Anderson gem from 2012? That movie’s got vibes, man, all twisty and deep, like a jellyfish stingin’ yer brain!

Inside the Red Light District in a Welsh city where sex is for sale 24 hours a day

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So, I head down to the pier after my shift. The sea’s crashing against the rocks, and I’m tryin’ to clear my head. I see the old Victorian pier, and it’s beautiful, but today it feels heavy. I’m thinkin’ about how many people walk there, just enjoying life, and now this. It’s a bummer, man.

'Inappropriate' Aberystwyth shop front plans refused