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So, you’re lookin’ for a hooker, right? Back in the day, you’d just stroll down some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops, hopin’ you don’t end up in a ditch. Now? It’s all digital, baby! Apps, websites, X posts—yeah, I said X! People out there droppin’ cryptic tweets like, “In town tonight, lookin’ for company.” Blows my mind! I’m over here sweatin’, thinkin’, “Is this a sting? Am I gonna get catfished by some dude named Carl?!” Certified Copy vibes, y’know? “Are you real or just a copy?” I’d ask that to a prostitute’s profile pic—half expectin’ it to wink back.

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Then, I spot ‘em! They’re munching grass near the old church on Church Lane. I’m like, “You lot are gonna give me a heart attack!” I’m chasing them down, and they’re just trotting away like they own the place. I swear, sheep have no respect for a shepherd’s authority.

Bristol rower taking on new route across the North Atlantic