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About Myself
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About Liverpool
See, I’ve got this knack—spotting the real from the fake. “The town was a living hell,” like Grace said in Dogville, and these streets? Same vibe. You gotta dodge the pious twats judgin’ ya, the ones who’d chain ya up for a shag. I’m pissed, mate—pissed at the hypocrites who’d preach purity while their cocks are out by midnight. Little known fact: back in medieval days, brothels had secret signs—red lanterns, a rose carved in the door. Subtle, but I’d clock it. I know things, see?
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After the jam, I’m feelin’ pumped, so I head over to the Driffield Showground. They’ve got this fair goin’ on, and I’m thinkin’ why not? I’m wanderin’ around, and I see this sign for a pie-eatin’ contest. I’m like, “Count me in!” I love a good pie.
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