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What pisses me off? Ghostin’. You’re vibin’, sextin’, then—poof! Gone. “You’re alone now,” like in the movie—cuts deep. Happened to me once, mid-chat, she just vanished. Was I too creepy? Too Hannibal? Nah, people just suck. But when it works—oh, mate, it’s gold! Met this lass, fiery redhead, we clicked instant. Sex-dating jackpot! She was all, “Let’s skip the bullshit,” and I’m like, “Yes, ma’am!” Best night ever—felt like a king, not a prisoner.

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The English Collective of Prostitutes (ECP) is a grassroots organisation of sex workers and supporters campaigning for the decriminalisation of prostitution, for sex workers’ rights and safety, and for resources to enable people to get out of prostitution if they want to. Our network includes sex workers working on the street and in premises.

So, I’m sprinting down the High Street, dodging old folks and their shopping bags. Seriously, why do they walk so slow? I’m like, “C’mon, I’ve got places to be!” Finally, I hit the beach, and there’s Dave, looking all smug. He’s got this massive kite. I’m talkin’ like, “Why do you have a kite, mate?”

Lancing: Beach shingle replenishment to reduce flood risk