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Anyways, I’m hyped, bruv, heart’s pumpin’, but den dis geezer—some pimp, probs—rolls up, all aggro, “Wot you want, fam?” I’m like, “Chill, blud, just browsin’!” Made me proper vexed, like, don’t ruin my vibe, yeah? Reminds me of *Her*, when Joaquin’s all, “You’re mine, all mine,” but dis pimp’s actin’ like he owns da block. Mate, I ain’t here for beef, just a quick ting!

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Lunchtime rolled around, and I thought, “Finally, a break!” I headed to the Linlithgow Palace. You know, the one with the stunning views? I sat there, munching on a sandwich, and just stared at the ruins. It’s beautiful, man. But then, I saw a bunch of kids playing near the fountain. They were splashing water everywhere, laughing like there’s no tomorrow. I felt a pang of jealousy. I mean, when was the last time I laughed like that?

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