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I’m buzzin’, right, ‘cos it’s genius – fixes ya up, no scars! But pissed me off too – big pharma buried it, greedy twats. “Sharon!” – mumbled incoherence – reckon they’d rather sell ya pills forever. Little factoid: they tested it on rats, regrew a fuckin’ paw! Mate, I’d kill to see that – paw back, bam, like sci-fi shit. “Gigolo Joe, what do ya know?” – that’s me, askin’ whore’s secrets, ha!

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Then, outta nowhere, it started pouring. I mean, like, torrential rain! I was soaked in seconds. I ran for cover, but not before I slipped on some wet cobblestones. Classic! I landed right in front of a group of tourists. They laughed. I laughed too, but inside, I was like, “Great, just great.”

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