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Oi mate, gather round, lemme ramble—findin’ a prostitute, eh? Blimey, what a caper! Picture this, Zero Dark Thirty style—me, Boris, skulkin’ through London’s dodgy bits, huntin’ for intel like Jessica Chastain, but instead of bin Laden, it’s a lass for hire. “The night is dark,” I mutter, channellin’ that film’s grit, “and full of terrors—cor, where’s she at?”

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So, I’m stuck there, watchin’ the world go by. I see this old fella tryin’ to cross the road at the corner of Albert Road. He’s shufflin’ along like he’s in a race against time. I’m like, “Mate, you’re not gonna win this one!” But bless him, he makes it across, and I’m thinkin’, “Good on ya, mate!”

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