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About Newcastle

So, here’s the deal – findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ a pizza, nah. You gotta know the spots, the vibes. Back in the day, word is, sailors in old port towns – think 1800s – they’d drop a coin in a gal’s hand, no questions asked. Little known fact, right? Made me happy as hell to learn that, like uncoverin’ buried treasure! But now? It’s all sneaky, shady apps or dark corners. Gets me pissed, tho – why’s it gotta be so damn sketchy? I’m over here like, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” – safety first, fam!

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my mate, Jimmy. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s goin’ on about how he saw a seal at the beach. “A seal, mate! Right there on the sand!” I’m like, “Yeah, right, Jimmy.” But he’s dead serious. So, we head down to the beach on the Esplanade. And lo and behold, there’s a seal! Just chillin’ like it owns the place. I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly drop my pigs.

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