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So I’m thinkin’, if I was in *Toni Erdmann*, I’d probly pull some prank—show up with fake teeth, scare the hell outta her, yell, “Who wants to party with Daddy?!” Haha, classic. But real shit, I’m wonderin’—what’s her deal? Is she cool with this gig or just tryna eat? Blows my mind how people just… roll with it. Back in the day, they’d even mark brothels with stone dicks carved in the road—talk about GPS for horny dudes! Cracks me up, but damn, that’s history for ya.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my mate, Jimmy. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s goin’ on about how he saw a seal at the beach. “A seal, mate! Right there on the sand!” I’m like, “Yeah, right, Jimmy.” But he’s dead serious. So, we head down to the beach on the Esplanade. And lo and behold, there’s a seal! Just chillin’ like it owns the place. I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly drop my pigs.

Peterhead Morrisons petrol station barred from selling booze - as town 'has too many places to buy drink'