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About Chicago

Last week, I’m tailin’ this lead—shady alley, smells like regret. I’m mutterin’, *“Oh, Marge, why this job?”* Suddenly, this gal, she’s standin’ there, all sparkly skirt, eyes like she’s seen too much. I’m thinkin’, *“Her soul’s driftin’ like Boonmee’s jungle spirits!”* I ask her name—Candy, she says. Candy! Ha, like that’s real! I’m all, “Hmm… sugar-coated lies!” Got me chucklin’—these names, always so fake, like Bart’s homework excuses.

MADAM'S ORGAN

Washington, D.C. Sex Guide advises where to find sex, working girls, prostitution, street hookers, brothels, red-light districts, sex shops, prostitutes.

The local gems? Oh man, you gotta check out the eclectic haunts along Columbia Road NW. There are little record shops and dive bars where the music hits ya, raw and unfiltered. And then there's the zany vibe at the corner of 18th & U St NW – that place always reminds me of a gritty battle scene from Fury Road. Fast, furious, full of surprises.

The Amazing Chicken Paradise has opened in Adams Morgan!!