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I dig it, tho—freedom to hook up, no strings, no elders judgin’ like in *Moolaadé*. “We refuse to be cut!”—that’s me, refusin’ to settle for lame dates. Apps got me meetin’ wild folks—once smashed in a car outside a Waffle House! True story, shit was lit—greasy hashbrowns and ass, best combo ever. But yo, some creeps out there—dude sent me a dick pic with a ruler next to it! Like, bro, I ain’t measurin’ your bullshit! Made me mad as fuck—respect the game, ya know?

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Don’t even get me started on the sweet spots for a date or gossip, like, check out Crescent Dr. The hidden gems on Lake Avenue are all over with local legends. Honestly, sometimes I’m like, “What the hell happened to common sense?” when I see pedestrians not even noticing Altadena’s charm. People get caught up in quick deals and forget to enjoy life. Jesus Christ, even my clients have deep thoughts at times after a deep tissue massage—so weird, so awesome.

‘Not acceptable.' Not a single home building permit finalized in Altadena following Eaton Fire