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About Dallas

Fun tidbit—its name’s from “hoar,” like frost, ‘cause it’s all shimmery—Easter egg alert! Bet Baz’d love that poetic shiz. Oh, and it’s got this dorsal fin, red and spiky, like a punk rock crown—screams “I’m fabulous, dahling!” Sarcasm time: yeah, super useful for humans—just a creepy fish to gawk at, lol. But nah, it’s a survivor, livin’ where no one else dares—respect!

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Don’t even get me started on the sweet spots for a date or gossip, like, check out Crescent Dr. The hidden gems on Lake Avenue are all over with local legends. Honestly, sometimes I’m like, “What the hell happened to common sense?” when I see pedestrians not even noticing Altadena’s charm. People get caught up in quick deals and forget to enjoy life. Jesus Christ, even my clients have deep thoughts at times after a deep tissue massage—so weird, so awesome.

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