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About Houston

I get all hyped thinkin’ bout it, but then—bam!—reality hits. Most of these gals ain’t that deep, and it’s a damn shame. Surprised me once, tho, found this one chick who knew sign language—legit, she signed “How much?” and I was like, “Holy shit, that’s hot!” Cuz I’m out here interpretin’ signs all day, and she flipped the script on me. Made me happy as hell, like, “Finally, someone gets it!”—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” ya know?

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I’m a relaxation nut, so I pick spots that feed my soul. Like that secret bench behind Bay-Village Library on Oak Loop, where the world just melts away. I often catch myself muttering lines from Tenenbaums: "I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested." And I'm like, bro, that's me sometimes on a lazy afternoon!

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