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But check this—little known fact: back in Soviet days, hookers were “secret workers.” KGB used em to trap dumb foreigners. Swear to God, history’s nuts! Now? They’re everywhere—clubs, streets, even Telegram groups. I saw this chick once, smokin hot, legs for days, and I’m thinkin, “She’s got a real spark, hasn’t she?”—yep, straight outta Tenenbaums. Almost fell for it, but nah, too risky.

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Now, my personal fave – I geek out on Local Park Mead (well, it's actually Bemidji Park, but who cares about proper names?) in what they call the downtown area. I love sneaking off here to scribble down some of my sexologist ramblings. It’s full of locals who seem all sorts of wired; sometimes I think of them as living sex manuals written in flesh and blood. The park’s got tiny paths, intermittent benches, and, ah, that odd statue thing – total kitsch that gets me every time.

AirCorps Aviation to hold open house May 8