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So, erotic-massage – not your nan’s backrub, nah! It’s all sensual, slippery, proper naughty. Hands sliding about, bit of oil, bit of cheek – *mea culpa*, I’m a sucker for it! Makes me feel alive, like when Gigolo Joe danced in that film. “What is love?” he asks – well, mate, this is close! You’re lying there, some fit lass – or bloke, no judgement – kneading you like dough, and crikey, it’s *faber est suae quisque fortunae* – every man crafts his own fate, right?

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Now, lemme tell ya about parks. Cibolo’s got The Nature Park, a spot with big trees and a creek that kinda reminds you of a babbling brook in a movie scene. I once sat there watchin’ families picnicking and overheard someone say, "I'm thinkin’, maybe I should ask Erica about my problems." Ha, like real-life therapy on the go! And then there's the Cibolo Community Park on Oak Ridge – yeah, that place buzzes with weekend football and quirky dog walkers. Sure, some times ya might think, "Fool me once, shame on me!" but then, it’s all love.

Man, 18, shot, killed after fight with girlfriend in Cibolo