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About Philadelphia

I spot one—red heels, smokin’ a cig—real cool, like she owns the block. I’m thinkin’, “Homer, you big lug, don’t stare!” But—D’oh!—she winks, and I’m sweatin’ like a pig in a bacon factory. Costs? Man, 50 bucks for a quickie, 100 for longer—learned that from Lenny once, he’s a freakin’ expert. Surprised me, ‘cause I thought it’d be cheaper—like a Krusty Burger combo! Ha! “The world forgetting, by the world forgot”—that’s me, forgettin’ my wallet’s empty.

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Over by Riverside Park – ain't that a name? – there's always some trippy scene goin’ on. People loungin’, dogs barkin’, kids runnin’, and even me takin’ a breather from the daily grind. I sometimes swear the river sings like one of them eerie tunes from “Leviathan.” “Motherf***er, it's like the damned river is whisperin’ secrets!”

Minnesota Vikings land massive steal who is a perfect Kevin O’Connell scheme fit to develop into an eventual starter down the road