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About Philadelphia

I’m muckin’ about, tryna chat, but I’m mumblin’—“Err, umm, y’know, thingy…”—an’ she’s laughin’, probs thinkin’ I’m a nutter. Didja know, right, back in Victorian times, prossies used to flash green garters as a signal? Mad, innit? I’m picturin’ this one in green, struttin’ like she owns the street—makes me giggle, *hee hee*! But then—oi!—some geezer shoves past, all sweaty an’ loud, an’ I’m fumin’, “Oi, watch it, ya prat!” Nearly lost me prossie there, heart’s poundin’—angry as a wasp in a jar!

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Oh, and let me throw in another Inherent Vice nod: “This is the end of the line, kid,” – that kinda sums up how Crestview can sometimes feel like you’re constantly on the cusp of an epic mystery, every corner hiding a new adventure, every block sparking that unexpected twist. Maybe it’s the spa life, metin’ all sorts of lost souls, some who literally wander in with TPS reports from outer space (lol), but it’s authentic, raw, and 100% Crestview, babe.

Crestview Police investigating gas station shooting