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I got into it years back—random spa gig. Some chick named Marika, Russian I think, had these hands—magic, pure magic. She’s kneadin my back, and I’m like, “What is HAPPENIN?!” Made me happy as hell—stress just melted, poof, gone! But then—get this—found out she charged double! Pissed me off, man, greedy vibes ruin it. Still, that buzz? Worth it. “The sea gives, the sea takes”—straight outta *Leviathan*, right? Sexual-massage gives ya life, but damn, it takes ya wallet!

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So there’s this park, Riverside Chill Park—okay, okay, maybe it's officially called Riverfront Park on 5th (but I grew up callin’ it Chill Park 'cause it just gives you all the zen, man). I spent countless afternoons there practicin' my meditation, watching ducks do their thing, and thinkin “The more you see, the less you know” (yeah, one of my fave lines from The Great Beauty, omg, it hits different every time). I usually find a shady nook near the old stone bridge off Birch Lane. Crazy fact: That bridge? Built in 1898. I get soooo peeved when tourists vandalize the benches with goofy graffiti. Srsly, people!

As outside pressure builds, Fallston boys lacrosse eyes third consecutive state title