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So here’s the deal—findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ pizza. Nah, it’s a hustle, a gamble. Back in the day, you’d hit the streets, shady corners, dim lights flickerin’. Now? It’s all online, bro—apps, sites, coded ads. Risk’s still there, tho. Cops, scams, crazies—odds of gettin’ burned? Bout 1 in 4, I reckon. Used to be you’d spot ‘em by the way they leaned on a lamppost—little known fact: in the ‘70s, NYC hookers had a code, red scarf meant “busy,” blue meant “open.” True story, blew my damn mind when I heard it.

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Stroll down S. Main Street and you'll see the classic Bavarian facades. It's like Wes Anderson's "The Grand Budapest Hotel" set to a low-budget carnival. Seriously, it's "exquisite" (if you squint like my old gran) but also a bit overdone. The whole town feels staged, like a movie set that forgot its script.

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