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Oh, and the lies! Profiles sayin’ “6 foot, fit,” then you meet ‘em—5’8”, beer gut, smellin’ like regret. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I’d say, if I could pick the liars out. Surprised me how bold they get—catfishin’ like it’s an Olympic sport. One time, this bloke sent me a dick pic, unasked! I’m like, “Mate, I didn’t order sausage!” Laughed my ass off, but also—eww, boundaries, ya pig!
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Rarrgh! Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout Haledon (us)! This city is wild, ya know? I live here, and its edges are as quirky as my own love life, haha! Rarrgh!
Haledon reorganization meeting: Mayor Michael Johnson, Councilwoman Nereyda Curiel sworn in
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