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Once heard a yarn—some prossie in Bristol tricked a lord, nicked his whole stash mid-shag! Reckon she could, too. “Thou plantest dreams in me skull,” I tell her, all dramatic. She rolls her eyes—fair, I’m a prat sometimes. Still, I’m chuffed—ain’t every day thou meetest a lass who’d outwit DiCaprio himself!

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Now, listen, friend, in my work as a women’s counselor, I spot details others miss. The tiny mural on Oak Street? It speaks of hope and resilience. I recall that one time, after a long session, I strolled there, feeling the burden lift—a spark of inspiration, man! And sometimes I get so wound up, I exclaim, “You shall not pass, despair!” as if commanding dark thoughts away.

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