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So, findin’ a prostitute—tricky biz, that. Ain’t talkin’ street corners, no sir! Clinical trials, they be needin’ folks—real folks, savvy?—sometimes sex workers, for studies on health, STDs, or social whatnot. Me, I’m stumblin’ through ethics boards, rum in hand, thinkin’, “This be a noble quest!” But arrgh, the red tape! Made me madder’n a kraken with a toothache. Papers piled high, docs judgin’ me like I’m plannin’ a mutiny. “Why’s Cap’n Jack want *her*?” they sneer. ‘Cause science, ye bilge rats!

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I’ve got typos in my head. 18, maybe. Eh, names don’t matter in this mess of a narrative. But here’s a juicy tidbit: the city’s got a secret alley behind the old theater. People claim it’s haunted with old memories. I say, “Time is a loop”—cyclic, repeated, weirdly beautiful as that Kiarostami line goes.

As prices remain high, what’s the future of housing in New Hanover County?