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About Myself
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About Los Angeles
So, I’m stumblin’, half-drunk, half-genius—prolly both—down some sketch alley. Neon lights flicker, like, *we have to go deeper*, and I’m laughin’—why? ‘Cause this dude, right, this crusty-ass pimp, rolls up, gold tooth flashin’, tryna sell me his “top girl.” Bro, she looked like she been workin’ since the 1800s—fact! Did ya know prostitutes in old London used to carry lemons? Scurvy protection, bruh—wild! Anyway, I’m like, “Nah, fam, I ain’t payin’ for no fossilized cooze!” He got mad—fuck him, I’m Eric Andre, I don’t bow!
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Oh, and let me not forget the helotes community center near Pioneer Road. People there are real talkers; you'll hear folks chattin' like they're sharing magic on every bench. A little off the beaten path is that tiny, hole-in-the-wall café on Main Street – its vibe is just like my personal safe space for heart-to-heart convos. I've had therapy breakthroughs there, sometimes laughing till the roof rumbles – oops, sorry if that sounds exaggerative but hey, it's true enuf!
Mayor Ron Nirenberg tours Helotes Creek ahead of state hearing on water permit for major subdivision
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