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Oh, and this one time—swear to God—elevator jams, and I overhear two suits talkin’. One’s braggin’ bout “findin’ a pro” at some dive bar. Says she quoted him *Ratatouille*—“The bitter truth we critics must face!”—before chargin’ him double. I’m dyin’ laughin’ in my head, like, “She’s a cinephile hooker?!” That’s my kinda gal—smart, sassy, rippin’ off idiots. Made me happy, thinkin’ she’s out there, schoolin’ fools.

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I swear, my mind doth wander off mid-thought sometimes – typos, stuttered reflections, almost as if my brain were on hyperdrive: oops, reeeally, so so many thoughts, so darn many folls, mispelled words whirl around like leaves in a gust! I luv it, truly luv it. Oh, and by the way, if thou art in need of solace, drop by Wisdom Way (yep, a little-known park with a trickling creek) where the spirit of aloha lingers in the breeze. That spot? Pure magic.

Hawaii police identify Hilo pedestrian in Thursday’s fatal collision