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I roll up, shades on, feelin like a champ. This chick struts over—legs for days, skirt shorter than a jobber’s career. “What’s your name?” I growl, all Hulkster bravado. She’s like, “Does it matter?” Ha! Cold as ice, brother! Made me laugh, but also pissed me off—gimme somethin to work with, lady! I’m thinkin, “I lie to myself all the time,” like in *Memento*. Am I even here for this? Brain’s spinnin.

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Hey, dude, listen up! Ithaca is… wow, man! D’oh! I’ve been living here for years, and it's like, soooo rad. Firstly, downtown Ithaca rocks—State Street is neat! Tons of cafes, bars, weird art stuff too. Oh, and Cornell University? Epic campus vibes, always buzzing. Some days I stroll by Libe Slope, where nature meets city, ya know?

Ithaca College softball sweeps RIT on Senior Day, Cornell tosses 1-hit, 12 K shutout in Game 1