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Fun story—back in ‘Nam, soldiers used prostitutes to smuggle intel. Sneaky, huh? I’d be all surprised, jaw droppin’, gears grindin’. “Mind blown!” I’d shout, like Riley’s brain gang. I’d probly exaggerate—say she’s got a heart o’ gold, or maybe she’s a spy! Ha! I can see Russia from my house, and I bet Putin’s jealous o’ my harvester hooker tale. Snarky? You bet. Useful? Eh, don’t try this at home, kids!

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Now, there's Main Street. Main Street, man. It winds right past the old liquor store and a collection of tiny cafes. I've seen neighbors—oh, you wouldn't believe—arguing over parking spots. I get mad watching that. But hey, it's all character, right? There’s this funky little alley, Winding Way, that most folks skip—no kidding—perfect place to hide when your head’s spinning like a broken record.

Carol Engelhardt, La Habra Heights City Council candidate, 2024 election questionnaire