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Aight, so I’m cruisin’, right? Lookin’ for a chick who’s down, cash in hand, tryna make it quick. Streets be talkin’, man—heard some wild shit ‘bout this one spot near the old train tracks. Word is, back in the ‘90s, some pimp got smoked there, left a ghost vibe—like Yubaba’s bathhouse, spooky as fuck! Ain’t nobody checkin’ for that history, but Snoop notices, ya feel me? Little details, baby.

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Oh, and darlin’, let me tell ya, being a sexologist in Middlesboro ain't all Freud and fancy theories. Nah, here it’s raw and real. I've seen couples fall in love on sleepy Sunday mornings in the local diner near Cedar Lane, and seen some crazy stuff in hidden corners of Nameless Alley. I once got mad ‘cuz a couple didn't tip their waitress—like, come on, show some respect! But then I remember, “The only way to be truly happy is to let go of being sad,” as Malick might say if he were our bartender, lightin’ up the night with wisdom, Lightbulb!

Middlesboro hosts Read Across America event