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Right, so you’re after one – where d’you start? Web’s your best mate, but it’s a minefield, yeah? Links dodgier than a photocopier jam. I’d be like, “This is my kingdom!” – channellin’ that *Pan’s Labyrinth* Pale Man vibe, all creepy and in charge. But nah, I’d muck it up – typin’ “prostitue” with 14 typos, fat fingers fumblin’. “David, you plonker!” I’d yell at meself. Happy though – freedom’s the dream, innit? No 9-to-5 grind, just vibes.

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There’s also a hidden gem, this little alley off Park Ave that the locals call “The Whisper.” Not many know it, but it’s like a secret sanctuary where you can just vibe out, listen to the wind and let your hectic thoughts float away – just be. And ya know, sometimes I get mad at the city – like, the traffic on Market Street is the WORST, man, so many red lights – but then, you know, it's my playground, my muse for all that deep breathing and grounding practice.

Baseball: Middletown North Edges Middletown South, 4-3