Ellie Minnetonka Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Philadelphia

Oh, and don’t get me started on the hypocrisy—makes me wanna scream! Dudes actin’ all holy, then sneakin’ off to her tent? Puh-lease. I’d call ‘em out, but I’m too busy laughin’. Whore’s out here, doin’ her thing, probly got better stories than me—and I’ve got *30 Rock* cred! Maybe she’s my soulmate, who knows? “Blessed are the forgetful,” right? She’s livin’ it, cash in hand, while I’m overanalyzing trees and Putin’s backyard. Screw it, I’d buy her a drink—she’s earned it!

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Man, Minnetonka got that beautiful vibe on Maplewood Drive—yeah, that spot near the river where you can literally hear life humming. I'm talkin’ about the Minnetonka River flowin’ by, twistin’ and turnin’ like it’s got secrets to tell. And oh, how can I forget the park on County Road 15? A little green oasis where couples and lost souls get their groove on, sometimes all while nature’s chattin’ in its own badass language.

Minnetonka walking group celebrates post pandemic anniversary