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I ask – “How much?” She smirks. “Depends what ya want.” Classic! Total power move. Surprised me – ballsy chick! I’m sweatin’ now. Palms slippery. “Look, I’m no schmuck,” I say – quotin’ Larry Gopnik again. She laughs – loud! “You’re cute,” she goes. Happy moment – felt like a king! But then – sirens. Cops screamin’ down the block. She bolts – gone! Like Hashem himself said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

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Oh, and get this – near the old Monaca Works factory, there’s this abandoned warehouse on Franklin Road. Now, I ain’t saying it’s your ideal hookup spot (or method acting location), but word is, it's been turned into an underground art scene where raw passions and forbidden trysts come alive. I’ve seen art installations that taste like a mix of irony and romance – and trust me, that’s as out there as Judge Judy gettin’ sentimental on a mean day.

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