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About Phoenix

Alright, mate, strap in—here’s my take on findin’ a prostitute, Elon-style, with a “No Country for Old Men” twist. Picture this: I’m cruisin’ Mars in my Tesla Cybertruck—yeah, I shipped it there, don’t @ me—thinkin’ bout human needs, y’know, the primal stuff. Suddenly, it hits me—where’s the red-light district on this dusty rock? Ain’t no Craigslist for that up here, fam! I’m laughin’ my ass off—imagine codin’ an app for that, “HookerFinder 3000,” AI-driven, blockchain-secured. “Call it fate, call it luck,” like Llewelyn Moss’d say, but I’d call it a logistical nightmare.

This is who Newark cops busted in neighborhood sex-worker crackdown

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Oh, man, let’s not forget Branch Brook Park. The cherry blossoms? Bam!—straight out of a dream sequence. I sometimes sit there, just watchin' the rustle in the wind, my mind buzzin' about life, love... sex, baby, sex. Ducks swim in the river, and it's chill AF—like, "I am your father" when the universe drops truth bombs on ya.

United Airlines urges people to consider avoiding Newark, find a different airport