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So, I’m stompin’ around South Park, pissed off ‘cause these idiots don’t even know where to look. I’m like, “I’m seriouslah, you guys suck!” Back in the day, hookers were just hangin’ on corners, but now? Shit’s all sneaky, online, like Zuckerberg’s dumb website. Did ya know, fun fact, prostitutes been around forever – like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae,” wolf chicks, ‘cause they howled or some crap. Ain’t that wild? I’m laughin’ my ass off thinkin’ ‘bout that.

Police raid Newcastle properties in sex trafficking probe as three arrested

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I be drivin' past Johnson's Bridge sometimes. Fanciful, right? Not many peeps know it's named for a settler who used to run a secret speakeasy. Wild story, right?! And about neighborhoods – check out Hillside! Got homes all snug on that bumpy lilly hill, with views so breathtaking they hit ya like a Wes Anderson freeze-frame moment, "This is our time, Sam." I fell in love with every twist an' turn of its crooked lanes.

This game is there for the taking from a Newcastle United perspective.